"Is that really going to happen, or is that just a false expectation appearing real?" This is a question I found myself asking quite a few of my clients this past month.

It's when you start to get ready for action that your gremlins and voices of doubt start to raise their voices, and you come up with all kinds of convincing reasons why you can't move forward. The worst bit is that all these reasons feel very real to you. So how do you get past this?

Check out what word is spelled from the first letters of 'false expectations appearing real'. You've got it - FEAR.

When your fears show their not so pleasant faces, what can you do to deal with them and not get paralysed? Well, first you need awareness of what these fears actually are.

What are all the fears that are preventing you from moving forward? I often suggest to clients that they write these down - it's amazing how much easier it is to handle something when it is in front of you on a piece of paper and not just inside of your head. "I'm afraid of..." is a powerful starting point to being honest with yourself and to truly acknowledge what's holding you back.

So you've got them written down - not the most pleasant of lists - what then?

Well, let's go back to the acronym behind fear - False Expectations Appearing Real. It assumes that your fears are actually false even though they may appear real to you. So explore each of the fears you have written down and write down your factual grounding for why each fear is real.

I did this same exercise with some of Europe's top MBA students at a conference in Barcelona last month. One of their joint fears was that they couldn't go and get the jobs they wanted, because it would then be impossible to pay off their substantial debts. After careful exploration of the fear, they realised that they actually had no FACTUAL grounding, just an assumption that you can't possibly do the work you want and get paid well for it. So they were allowing this fear run their lives, and yet this fear was based on a story they had created but not verified.

So the next step for them? Find out the facts. The homework they assigned themselves was to research their alumni, find out the ones doing the type of work they wanted to do and find out how they made it happen. Hence getting over the false expectations of what's really possible.

Now look back to the groundings you wrote down next to each of your fears. Have you verified these as facts? Or are you operating on false assumptions and expectations and projecting them to be real?

Last autumn I caught up with an old acquaintance of mine, Baylene Li. I'd previously met her at a Millenium party in New Zealand, and was fascinated to hear how far she'd got from her ideas back then to being showcased in some of the world's top fashion magazines today. Her story is brief and to the point - don't think about it too much, just do it! Find out more about her work on her website - http://www.baylene.com/

How would you describe yourself? Who is Baylene?
I was born in Taiwan, grew up in New Zealand, and now live in Singapore. I have spiky hair and a very beautiful smile. I've recently visited New York City. I wear my own clothing label that is world famous in Singapore.

What are you working on now?
I am working on autumn/winter collection 2005.

What has been your journey to what you are doing now?
I started my designing career at one of the leading New Zealand fashion houses. I moved to Singapore in Dec 2002 for my overseas experience. Launched my first solo collection in Sep 2003, named it after myself - .B A Y L E N E.

What was the turning point?What voices did you have?
Why not me?!

What preceded the decision to change/alter your career path?
Encouragement from my love ones.

How did you feel? What insecurities, questions, doubts?
I never thought about it too hard. The more you think, the more you worry the more scared you get. It is all to do with working together your mind and your body.

How are you feeling now? What questions do you have? How do you see the future?
I am great. Question is how I am going to meet deadline for my next collection. More fashion shows in more cities in the future!

Would you do anything differently?
Nope.

This is a recommendation from a year ago - but never ceases to be a good addition to anybody's bookshelf - enjoy!

Feel the Fear - and Do it Anyway by Susan Jeffers

"I wholly agree with a comment I came across recently that if you only ever read one self-help book, then this is it. Having read many over the years this simple, clear book is definitely the one that has most dealt with what stops me being me - with simple steps to get there. If fear is the opposite of love then addressing that fear using Susan Jeffers's unique wisdom and tips frees us to be and love ourselves and those around us.

Jumpstart - Get Out of Your Career Rut

Saturday-Sunday, June 4-5, 10 am to 5.30 pm
Hilton Green Park, London W1

Do you want to leave your job, but aren't sure what you'd do instead? You've been hoping things would change for the better, but they haven't, and now you just need to get out? You might have some ideas of what to do, but you want to be sure and there's never the time. If so, this unique weekend has been designed to support you in answering these questions and moving forward. We will use cutting- edge tools and exercises to get to really know your unique passions, strengths and preferences and you will walk away with a realistic but challenging action plan.

Satu is a professional coach and facilitator working with professionals who are already successful and yet who feel their work lacks meaning and fulfillment. If you feel you aren't using your potential and are seeking ways to do so, Satu is the coach for you! She has clients in the UK, continental Europe and the US.

She has a Masters degree in Organisational Behaviour and Intercultural Communication from the Helsinki School of Economics. She is finishing her coursework to graduate CoachU this spring and has completed initial coursework at Strozzi Institute. She is a member of both the ICF (International Coach Federation) and SIETAR UK (Society for Intercultural Education, Training and Research).